[002] asked again and again...and the big eis between both side

Where shall I start to ask?

I feel, inside me there is two levels of questions right now.

One level is the "reality" level, how it works, what he has to do, etc.

Facts, realities.

The other level is more "feeling" level.

So I started to ask simply,

I also told him, I would like to ask him very simple, basic, naive questions like a child.

Maybe, it will sound very stupid.

He said (wrote) to me,

"don't worry. feel free. ask whatever you like.".

So called "beginner mind" is very powerful.

Often we feel ashamed that we have some basic questions.

"Am I the only one person in this room, who is asking such a basic question?
Am I the only one stupid beginner and can not follow the conversation?"

But if we ask, the basic questions,

often we get an answer and I feel that the topic becomes more clear.

I often say in my workshop

"please, ask if you are not clear,

your question will make the think much clear and understandable

and this is good for all of us.

Not only YOU are willing to ask,

I am sure, there is more people who are not clear in this room

and can not ask.

What you feel, is not just you.

There is others , maybe not so strong but feels a little part of the same thing."

In Process Work, I learned the concept of

"roles in the field".

What you feel strongly inside you,

it is a big part of you,

but maybe it is not only you....

I encourage with this concept myself ;-)

and started to ask.

--------------------------------------------------------------

Daya: how could you join and come out of your country?

Argh:

its really hard thing first i cant go to Israel without a permit

which is impossible to have it

without any reason like going to hospital or you are a business man

and they ask for a lot of paper

but because it was an international event and the coordinator of that WW (=World Work seminar) is really working hard

he did grant some of us permits and other the aint lucky the refuse them without saying why even

so that's the first part

and after i get the permit the trip has begin

bon voyage

i have to travel from Qalqilia to raamalah with many checkpoint in the way

and every one have to stop us

and check us again and again

every time and ask to where you going to

and for what

and if the mean soldiers the will try to make as longer as the can

by asking question out the subject like what you study,

what you doing for living,

where did you born,

why you did come back

and a lot of that and more

How was it for you to talk about the conflict between Israel and Palestine with Israeli people?

Argh:

to be honest

i was in the beginning a aware of what i am gone do

but when i did arrive there and start to look around me

and saw the eyes looking towards me

i felt like i have to do something for both of us

so all what i was thinking about is to break the ice between us

and then will See what happen from there

and i have to trust in the process or it will not work for us

--------------------------------------------------------------

I am so happy that we started this project.

To read your words, Argh is so real and also very simple that also I can understand.

Here are information and sharing what I can not read in books.

Thank you so much for sharing.

What was MY first trip to Israel and be there?

It was 3 years ago, so 2007?

I remember, there was really no useful information about Israel.

The Japanese Foreign　Ministry wrote,

that is too dangerous to go there so I should think one time more if I want really go there.

Also my friends and my parents was against my travel.

I also remember, that I was shocked the plane ticket was so expensive.

There was not a good connection to Israel, I had to go first to Europe and than fly a little bit "back"

to the east direction....

I also had problem to get information because of my little tendency of dyslexia (problem with reading),

so I gave up to prepare and just let it come, wondering how much I can follow the process...

I criticized myself for this unknown part,

"you should know what is going on there,

specially there is something terrible happening,

it is a shame not to know about it!"

But at the end, it was good so.

I could feel the atmosphere and I was really plain.

No idea, means, no stereotype.

Yes, I remember the first moment the air was so strain with the tension.

Not so much reaction...

Just, that we were togheter, that people came to meet and talk,

that the interest was there was already amazing.

I did not know, that Argh had so long way to come.

So many questions.

Yes, I had it too.

To be asked so many questions

at the air port from Israel.

They asked me too, where I know my friends,

what kind of seminar is,

why I am here,

etc.

It sounds not so much welcoming,

was my impression and also I felt the protection from this country.

But it was just one time.

And the atmosphere at the air port

and at the checkpoint are also different.

I know it now, after visiting you.

Argh, you are living next to Israel and inside your own country,

why you have to be checked so much?

Where is the freedom to move around, travel around whereever you want?

Who's property　is the planet Earth?

I really want know

how is that situtaion able to happen?

It is not logical,

I can not understand.

Like my son,

who visited with me this summer my friends

in Israel and in Palestine.

He loved the people there and become friends.

Like me, and could not understand

why the Israeli are putting sand on the street in Qualqilia

that the people can not go simply to the next village.

He could not understand,

why the Israeli friends can not visit Argh.

And I could not explain it.

Another Israeli friend told me next day

"it's true, it is not logical.

This situation is impossible to explain."

In one level I know people in both side want to have peace and freedom.

In another level, the reality of the Palestine are too injustice.

The conflict has so many layers and levels,

it is too difficult to say something about this.

So what I can is more to listen and to ask and get to know moe about it...

[001] the dialog is starting slowly....

we are trying to find out the best way for our approach,

to communicate in different form of Internet soft,

e-mail, skype, facebook......

Also the style is still not fixed yet.

Is it easier to write and read in dialogue form like in skype, or do I have to edit it?

I will try, and let's watch the feedback.

Feedback from me, from Argh and from the readers.

But the process them self, looking for some new way is already a creating process....

even we just started like a baby to crabble around, I can feel the "interest" of both side, and that is so important energy for doing something together, don't you think so, Argh?

here, a little dialogue started yesterday and I want share here:

==========================================================

Daya: why you came to this seminar?
(a world work seminar organized in Israel as conflict facilitation training)

Argh:

because i am intersted in dialog between Israeli and Palestinian in both side and with the international community

Daya: but, why were you interested? what was your thoughts behind your interest?

because, I saw there is not many people who are interested in that....

Israeli and Palestine participant from this seminar told me, that they also have difficulties to talk about it with the friends and people in their own area.

Argh: you know, after i get the intensive in Portland and we did go to yachat i heard about the first time there and form the name of it. "sitting in the fire"

i did wont to be part of it

Daya: I see, you were BEFORE that in intensive course of process work! and you told me once, you met the man who introduced you process work for first time...where?

Argh: in peace mission with an organisation called "breaking the ice", form Berlin (http://www.breaking-the-ice.de/index.php)

==========================================================

I want also talk a little about the language.

I just used the spell check soft ( amazing soft! it helpes me to write better English and I will NEVER learn the right spelling) changed few parts of our conversation that it is easier to read. but including the spell of the English words, I let it be how it was.

with following reasons:

reason 1)

first, I do not know English so well, had no chance to learn English at school because I was very busy to learn German and French, so I am not able to check the "right" writing.

reason 2)

I joined in so many group work and discussion situation, in real and in cyber space, and we were expected to speak English.

The English language was sooooo "normal " to use,

so many native English speaking people leading the conversation and the other who had more difficulties had to try to follow.

Difficult to follow because of the speed and the words...

(Oh, I have the desire to talk and write about rank awareness and about deep democracy, but now, I do not have the time for it and also, this is not the right place and moment...)

Anyway....

How many times I had to say, that they are speaking to fast and we can not understand?

How many times, I had to ask them TO WHO YOU ARE SPEAKING, if you want that I ( or the other people who can not speak English as well) understand YOU, please do not forget me.

Sometimes not only English speakers, when we are speaking in our native language, we forget to who we are speaking to.

Sometimes I have the feeling this person is just speaking for them self....

Of course, I catch myself that too!

How many times I found my self speaking so fast, when I speak Japanese or German.

Yes, English is a world wide spoken and learned language but why? there is so many political and historical facts and reasons behind this situation...

So, in one hand, as a perfectionist Japanese person, want to check the English and be nice and good, (a voice in me who is criticizing all the time that I am not good in English)

on the other hand, I know it is not necessary and so natural and so real, that we are not speaking and writing the perfect English. ( that makes me much more relaxed and take it easy to talk and use English)

I use English with him because we do not have any other languages right now to communicate. After few talk and after our own experience with the other culture, Argh know few Japanese words and I know few Arabic. just a little number of words. and it is so nice when we are using that, I feel the atmosphere and the energy of that moment is going up.

Argh has to learn for the TOEFL test, and I also have to write in English some text, I have to pay (wow) someone to edit it that I can pass this.... so there is few reality and rules in this world that we have to learn and be able to speak "perfect" English and when we are speaking about that, the air becomes more heavy and pressured, I quickly feel the ghost voice inside me, that to be able to speak perfect English is so such a privilege (rank) and I am so jealous about the people who are native speaking English. But this story is again, another story!

I am sure, this topic about the language will also come in our dialogue, we already talked few times about it.

see you!

welcoming comments

so, we are starting in our pace to communicate.

we are exited about this project and we wish that many people can join and read this blog.

Friends around the world, please read and use this blog, let the other friends know about this approach.

the URL from this blog is:

http://palestinejapandialogue.blogspot.com/

all comments are welcome,

you can try to use the comment field and if it is not working just sent it to me, and i will post it.

info*shantidaya.com

(change * mark to @ mark)

relationship and interaction with people is the most powerful motivation to keep moving.

please interact with us.

I already got a comment from Arny and Amy Mindell, they sent me an e-mail because the comment did not work:

==============================================

Dear Daya and Argh, we wish you both good times and luck in the BIG

worldwork you are doing, face to face, and person to person meetings around

the world. Thank you. Big hug, amy and arny

==============================================

thank you, Arny and Amy.

some notes until the dialogue starts

When I thought about this weblog,

I remembered a very nice word from my big teacher:

"In my mind, world work ( and process work) is about relationship" by Arny Mindell

what we want try

(the street in front of my house, Tokyo)

It is 4am in Japan,

but my body is still living in the Israeli time zone.

This time, I finally could visit my friend Argh in Qalqilia, Palestine.

I know him since 3 years, we met us every year for few days.

Through conversation, I could get information how their life are.

But I could not imagine.

I had no picture.

But during my stay in Israel this time, finally, I visited him. Finally I could see, how they are living.

I could see, hear, smell, feel, ....

live there.

Even it was a very short time,

I was there.

(the view from Argh's house to the street, Qualqilia)

Now, I can imagine how it is.

Now, I am ready to ask him and make questions.

In our meeting, in a seminar, we are trying to find a way to make some change in the deep conflict about Israel/ Palestine.

The main concept of them is how to learn

"deep democracy" (check http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Deep_democracy)

for each of us and how we can make space for the other without victimizing our self.

We are using role plays and art therapies,

meditation and movements,

working as a big group and smaller groups.

We are networking and get friends.

It is a facilitation training seminar,

where we want learn more about the skills how do deal with conflict.

In the seminar,

we are talking to each other supported by few facilitators

and we are deepening the feeling and the meanings of the each words and the information around that words slowly to understand each other.

Very deep, very hot and very intense place and time.

I love this challenge and I will keep joining there as much as possible.

Here, what Daya and Argh want try is more dialog based form,

more in personal level interaction

to understand more about our self.

I am specially interested about Argh's culture and situation and reality.

The process to get him know and to visit his culture,

to go through the checkpoint

and to become friends with his family

and than go back again through another checkpoint to Israel side.....

to experience,

that I can visit him but he can not come out with me from this gate....

the time flows different and they communicate differently.

They are dealing different with problems and they felt their body different.

What they eat and how they live was totally different

and I could not imagine so real until I was there.

Yes, I know few people from Palestine through the seminar,

but it was in Israel.

It was so important for me that I was there this time.

Specially with my son together.

It was not an action as an activist, it was personal visit with my family to my friends family.

To use the method like in seminar is very useful but not enough.

But we need more dialogs and conversation in different levels.

What we want try here is to know more direct and personal the others side through asking question and dialogue together.

His story is so interesting and also very important, that we said lets share that in the blog.

We both are not the type of people who can read big books written in difficult words in English to know about this conflict.

Let's talk more simple, easy and personal.

That's the most short way to get know each other.

Please remember,

that we are just personal friends who are talking as a individual.

I am not the stereotyped person as a Japanese and Argh the same,

we both have very international and global background.

I also want say,

that I am not seeing Argh as a Victim side and my Israeli friends are the oppressor.

Through the seminar and also my friendship to people from both side,

it is very complicated situation in many levels

that I can not say easily what is true and what is wrong.

This blog is also not for that aim,

to "discuss" about the terrible history and happenings.

The aim of this blog is to ask and listen and understand.

I just simply wanted know more about Argh and his culture.

It is simply sad and painful

that when I talk in Israel side with my friends there on skype with Argh,

and we are not living so far away and we can not meet together.

To say " hey, come over and have a cup of tea" is taboo in this scene, because it is impossible.

And I want know more about this.

Why we can not simply go in and out of the country, just because of the political situation.

I feel like a child, like my son.

I know the power (rank) of " beginners mind".

I will ask.

I will simply ask.

And I thank Argh for his openness for my simple questions and our challenge and looking forward how our dialog will flow....

in peace

daya